Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion
I am feeling like the little engine that could right now, or maybe even the energizer bunny. I just keep going and going. Sometimes I need to take breaks, or I get distracted. That is when I take a step back and assess what it is I really do want. It is in those moments that the universe usually interjects and reminds me.
In this most recent instance, the moment when I was feeling like I could be swayed in either direction, I received a phone call from a company asking me if I am available to work. I did not even submit myself that day for any work. The day of shooting, I was the happiest I had been in a long time. I felt rejuvenated and ready to take over the world. This is truly what I want for my life. This is the career I want to pursue and the job I want to go to every day. Thanks for the reminder universe!
So… this is my fight song. Take back my life song.
Naturally I do my best thinking with my moustache on… It means I’m getting down to business. Down to figuring out my next move. Where I want to be. What I want to be doing.
Todays brainstorming session is focusing on combining forces. Working with someone. I feel that working by yourself can become monotonous and boring, but working with someone can bring new light to any work.
The more I think about it, the more excited I get to put ideas into motion. I’m not sure what craziness will come out of this, but stay tuned because I’m pretty sure it will be awesome!
I’ve always lived my life in a way that you write out a to-do list and as you complete tasks you cross them out. Then you move on without taking into account how long each task will take you. For instance… On my list today was to write a blog. Normally I would write, edit and post and it would probably take me an hour. However, I now have a schedule that I am to follow only allowing me a certain amount of time per day on each task. Today I am allotted 30 minutes. I probably won’t finish it today (2/5/16) in my allowed time. And honestly, it messes with my mind.
The idea that I can’t finish what i started is absolutely messing with me. There is such a satisfactory feeling of completing a task that I feel like I am missing with this new schedule. However, I also am able to complete more tasks this way… Which is also making my head spin.
I’m a work in progress and I’m sure I’ll get the hang of it one day. The best thing I can do for myself is keep trying. It will become second nature one day.
Ever feel like you’re just not doing something right? Or your not moving? Feeling stagnant? It’s been a rough few months for me. I was starting to feel unmotivated. It was hard for me to self start on the daily tasks that needed to be done.
What can you do when you feel like that? Well I have a Thomas J. Bellezza who pushes, and kicks my butt when needed. But besides that… I got a gig. This gig was just what I needed to start feeling like the actress I know I am.
Since that gig, I have made connections with individuals I never would have met otherwise. And have started a small snowball that will continue to grow…. Or rather created a domino effect. When one falls the rest will follow…. I can feel how busy my life is going to become.
If I could give you any advice… Keep moving. Keep pushing. Keep following those big dreams of yours. Something is bound to happen sooner or later. Never give up!
Last weekend my consultant, Thomas J Bellezza
( http://bbrproductions.com ) and I went over to the Players Theatre in Manhattan to attend an acting workshop led by Mr. Alan Gordon. I was so excited to be surrounded by people with passion and a zest for life.
Upon walking up the stairs I was immediately greeted by Mr. Gordon himself. At that moment, it was clear how excited he was to be able to teach this workshop and meet all of these new people.
Once we were seated in the room, Mr. Gordon began promptly with the material of the Meisner technique and giving ample examples of the technique using professional actors. Everyone was then given a turn in the first round of repetitions. This cycled through 3 times with plenty of time given to each student. By the end of the three hours we had a fairly good idea of what this workshop was all about.
Everyone takes something different away from every experience. For me, this was a great reminder that living in my head is a dangerous place. I feel that I can also use this lesson in life and not just in my acting. Learning to be more present when i am talking with the people in my life. Thanks to Mr. Gordon for a wonderful workshop and filling it with such talented people.
I have always been a firm believer in the power of positive thoughts. 2014 was a particularly rough year for me. With 2015 here, I felt that there was no better time than to let go of all the things that were no longer serving me. Most of those things were residual emotions from last year that I was holding onto.
When the clock struck midnight making it 1/1/15, I was a new person. With new ideas and new feelings about my life. Positivity was always a mantra of mine, but this year was different. I felt it in my bones.
Now almost 6 weeks into the new year, I can feel the difference. I can smell it in the air. After letting go, I have surrounded myself with positivity. Let me tell you, since I have started this new life… only positive things have come back to me.
With good things on the horizon I can’t help but stop and think about how I got here. This is that change I mentioned in a previous post. It truly is amazing when you sit back and think about the connections you’ve made and how they’ve encouraged your journey.
I am forever grateful to be moving forward. Working on my dreams.
Now that this change is staring me in the face… I am more anxious and completely at ease with it. I’m excited and scared. But I’m absolutely ready for it!
What a great experience, with exceptional talent.
Change has always been a scary concept for me. Im not sure why or where it stems from. Even when things really NEED to shift, I always find it difficult. However, I am pleased to report that I have begun to take the steps to change my life for the better.
I began working with a consultant (BBR PRODUCTIONS), together we are working on a plan to get my life on a track so that I may follow my dreams and support myself while doing so. I have lists of things to do, people to contact, and things to work on and every day i will be completing a little bit at a time.
I am determined to make this change. This change is going to be the best change of my life. Despite how scary this ride is going to be. I’m ready for it.
I know that it has been awhile, but I am here… I swear… I have been busy living my civilian life. Now that is a term I read in my book, ACTING MAKE IT YOUR BUSINESS written by Paul Russell, which expresses that as an actor we live double lives. The acting, entertainment, auditioning, performing, rehearsing life versus the gotta make money, waiting tables, making phone calls, selling cars or whatever it would be that pays the bills. I have been trapped in that world for the time being.
I would like to make it known that I am working on projects and bettering my skills in the meantime. This is not downtime, it is just prep time. It is hard work but it must be done. For me, saving money is really hard, and I then made the hard decision to not audition for volunteer acting jobs because the money spent in gas to get to these places would not be worth it. *sigh*
Just means that better things are coming my way. Work hard. Do your research. Market. Network. Grow your brand.