Why?

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imageWe all have things that we want to do, we have to and then things that we find reasons to do. Those things would work quite nicely in that ball of “WHY”.

I want to be a successful actress. There are many things that I need to do. Want to do. And sometimes, find reasons to do. But why is it easier for me to find a reason to go to CrossFit, flip a 250 Pound tire, do 100 pushups, deadlifts… burpees? I can leave  my house. Drive 15 minutes to the gym. Torture myself for an hour. Come back home and somehow have no energy to do any of the tasks at hand to get me where I need to be.

I want to be a successful actress. And yet, I find reasons to follow a different path. I dont want to be a professional or even an amateur powerlifter.

I want to be a successful actress. However, I seem to find excuses not to do my work. Being an actress is so much more than just acting. Just an hour a day. I spend that hour flipping tires, but why cant I buckle down and focus on creating a budget, contact agents, write postcards or any of the other millions of things on my to do list.

I want to be a successful actress. The happiness I feel, the gratifying feeling deep in my soul. The way it feels to be on stage singing for a crowd. Standing in front of a camera. Have you ever really looked at what makes your soul smile?

My soul is never happier than when I am following my dreams. I want to be a successful actress and that needs to stick with me, when I am so tired that I cant move. Remember the why. The reasons I do what I do, and what I want and where I want to be.

I want to be a successful actress.

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Comfort Zones

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When I sit back and think about the person I was yesterday, a week ago, a month ago, last year  or even years ago… I realize that I am constantly jumping out, busting at the seams of my comfort zones. I am breaking the boundaries and moving forward. Staying stagnant in one place can only get you so far, but when you start moving and facing fears is when you truly grow as a person.

In the last few months I have pushed myself in ways that scare me. I drove in NYC to set. Me. the girl scared to death of driving in that craziness…. did it. I feel like I could conquer the entire world.  Currently I am working on coming out of my shell. Saying “hi” and “bye” to people in every place that I visit. Its hard for this girl who has become a quiet little mouse over the years. New adventures means new Courtney.

I can’t wait to see what comfort zones I break in the next few months.